Labia Leverage

Today at the park, Big Scout and Little Scout had a role reversal. Little Scout is usually the dominant one, the one in control between the two. But this morning the tables turned when Big Scout made a new friend, Boston Terrier Mo. Little Scout not did approve of the relationship because Mo was taking the attention she usually received. Not used to being left out, Little Scout tried her best to get into the wrestling but it was clear that three’s a crowd. Ear biting, growling, smacking, none if it could take Big Scout’s attention away from Mo and return it to Little Scout. So, the Chihuahua/Terrier/Pug/Pinscher/Monster did what she had to do: hump.

What’s interesting is that I saw a human female do the same thing at a bar last night (no actual dry humping but some fondling). In fact, I have seen many women doing this throughout my time in NY, Boston, Philly, LA and London. Women using their womanhood to garner attention seems to be a trend throughout the US and perhaps the world. I’ve seen girls making out with multiple guys, girls making out with girls and girls dancing just a little “Too Close” in order to get attention. The thing is, like Little Scout humping Big Scout, it has nothing to do with sexuality, but everything to do with dominance.

Not to argue in favor of the whores out there, but if you think about it, women using their body to get attention from men, is a feminist notion.* Whereas women used to prim and properly wait for men to come to them, these women are actively seeking the men and objectifying them, instead of the other way around. We’re using our bodies to manipulate their bodies (penis more exactly) which in turn manipulates their (one-track) mind. This reverses the traditional relationship and puts the female in control. If men are going to judge us based on our breasts regardless (which they always will), why not rub those breasts in their face and use them to undermine men? OK, maybe don’t literally rub them in their face, just wear a V-neck or something, you get the point. All I’m saying is, maybe it’s time to use our cleavage to get control, labia to get leverage and areola to get authority...or maybe just do some "too close" dancing.

*Most actual feminists do not agree with anything I have written above. New York Magazine writer Ariel Levy says the concept of women using their lady parts for attention would "likely have caused their feminist foremothers to vomit." Though she was specifically referring to things in the Girls Gone Wild realm, which I am in no way promoting here, as blatant flashing at mass crowds is much different than grinding with one person.<sup>†

†</sup>Feminists would REALLY disagree on this one.